Movie Review: Pandemic 2016

This cover has nothing to do with the movie. Who the hell is him?

I am making this review as I finish to see the movie. This movie tries to be several things but fail at most of them. Is it a zombie genre? May be but probably isn't it.  Is a apocalpytic genre? Hmm he tries to be but we don't have that much information to tell for sure. Is it a 1st genre with videogame tendencies? Yep it is but at the same time he tries not to over do it. 

So, it seems a virus swept throughout the united states infecting everyone. First they become sick and then a bit of insane roaming the streets killing everyone. As they arrive at level 4 they become inert and then level 5 - which are a new improve version of crazy people aka zombies. IT remind me of David Moody Haters.

The protagonist is Rachel Nicholls a doctor who is trying to find her daughter. First she is seen in a compound where she and three other persons are tasked to find survivors but when everything goes wrong she then turns to her task of finding her daughter and husband. 

What went wrong with this movie? 
Almost everything. 

All movie is like this... Original?

-The plot itself to begin with. So, the coupound is run by the CDC and uses people to get survivors but don't give them food so they have to forage out there? Why? Why the army/militia don't turn on them?



-To fetch other people the CDC put on a bus four people - a doctor, a navigator, a driver and a gunner. WHAT? This sure look like a videogame (again) - Why not a doctor and three gunners? A gunner can't read a map or drive? Ridiculous...  

- The Level 1 to 5 haters/zombies/infected are just wrong. They can talk and communicate but kill other no-infected why? In the film they say that level 5 eat people but what about the previous levels? So why they turn violent and kill other people? Why not kill other infected?

Rachel Nichols - The only reason to watch the movie.

As they are fightning in the house with level 5, those uber-zombies Rachel Nichols kills them with apparently easily where three hours before she was paralyzed with fear but a person might snap out of it. Yep. But the zombies are not even trying to harm her. They could scratch her and trasmit the disease but they are just grunting but never harming no-one....

- The city got roaming level 5 who kill everyone (except other level 5 I presume), other infected people who are not violent, other who are violent and non-infected people. In space of a city block you see a priest taking care of his flock and in other block some infected just put a un-infected girl as a bait. I really didn't understand 

- Oh, the husband of Rachel because he was infected he locks and kills himself but other people -john does - they try to eat people? That's a bit strange plot hole... I understand they have levels but he was bleeding from his ears so I bet he was not level one anymore. 

- In the end they are escaping the level 5 and drop from the roof but have time to "get up" oh no, go go go ... "I am not leaving you..." bla bla for 1m... Those Level 5 are really slow...

- The ending is absurd! Hate it. 2/10 (The one point is Rachel Nichols)

Movie Review: Jupiter Ascending 2014

This is a story of cosmic porportions. Imagine that earth is just one of countless planets with life. And The know universe was divided by two sons and one daughter. Imagine that our and other worlds develop life so in the end can be harvest to make something that give other people eternal youth. We are just cattle. Now imagine that DNA (which is different from everyone) has a way of duplicate after countless generations - imagine rebirth or reincarnation. Now imagine that one of such duplicate was born on Earth. But this duplicate is no other than the mother of three sons. And if she wants she can reclaim her rightful place. One son is trying to kill her, one is coercing her to marry him so he can receive all her assets and the other is trying to manipulate her.

This movie is quite good for a sci-fi full of action and special effects. Really enjoy the setting and I thought the special effects were quite good. At times, as I saw some of the ships designs it remind me of Warhammer 40K but that's me.

I think the main actress Mila Kunis has a great character and to be truth all of them play them quite nicely. The long life of the brothers had almost a insanity feel which all three portray it quite admirable. Even the action figure and main actor did it.

I think, with all fluff lying around with this movie this could be a blockbuster and one of many films. There were so many avenues to explore. The story of the brothers, the war between the brothers - darn you could make a series about those special wolfman with wings. The scope was enormous but something went wrong and the movie didn't appeal to everyone. out there. The critics didn't enjoy it and people had a mix feeling. In IMDB had 5.4 in more than 100K ratings. The producers were the same of the Matrix btw....

 I really like the movie and it's one I will see in ten years with my child.

Movie Review: The Pyramid 2014

I watch this movie with some interest because I really enjoy the Mythos behind the pyramids and egyptian lore. I really think that great things could have been done with this movie. (I must say that at that time I was playing Arkham Horror with the Curse of the Dark Pharoah so was a little into the all the theme).

Let us see, you've got a discover of a new pyramid so you can make a great atmospheric / claustrophobic first person movie but somewhere along the way you lose yourself (well inside a pyramid is easy to be lost).

You've got this gorgeous babe (Ashley Hinshaw) and her team of archaeologists find a hidden pyramid but at that time Cairo his facing their spring revolution so they are expelled. But they have a little time left and so they try to adventure forth. Well from this moment on this (and before that) the movie is almost a found footage of some sorts and that kind of movies are coming a lot these days and either they are done properly or they are crap.

In this movie the characters are kind of lame. You've got a Lara Croft wannabe (We almost  see her boobs o- totally relevant to the plot) and the men are weak and behave stupidly.

The antagonists, well, you've got some monsters that live on that Pyramid for thousand of years, cats that the Egyptians worship and fear them and you've got a beast part man part jackal called anubis. As I said, the last part of the movie is indeed a history lesson of Anubis and the Egyptian Lore which I really enjoy their intepretation.

Bad acting (of some actors) and worst of all the bad horror mistakes (I've heard something, I heard it too, let split up, ok) bad pov mechanics and one of the things that upset me is that if you don't have money don't make cheap CGI - Anubis effects were horrible

"Descent" or "Alien vs Predators" are influences of this movie, no doubt about it and by the way, if you are trying to make a movie with an historic/mythological setting then get the facs right. Some mythological are just wrong. If you don't know who Anubis was then you should do a movie about Him.


So, should you watch the movie? 
I don't think that this movie deserves are 1 or 2 in my chart. They have some redeeming qualities and entertain me for one hour and half. If you enjoy Egyptian Mythology but are not bothered if the producers and creators know who the heck was one of the gods then go ahead. If you like first person shooters and want to watch a movie in the same likeness then go ahead. If you just want to see Ashley Hinshaw boobs then look no further. It is not a clean shot but you get the 'picture'. 3.5/10 

Movie Review: Shelter 2015

This a low budget film and is set on a bunker. Supposedly something happened and the three strangers and a couple go hide in a bunker. First they only know that something nuclear happened to the world. A machine tells them that the air is not good and they must wait some time. First is two weeks,  then it's some months and so on. The film itself is not told in a continuus line but becomes to swap some time-lines.

First of all this movie deals with six people in one space and they had to continuosly do something new so they wouldn't be bored to death. One of those interesting things was that each one of them had something particular to them and so it was good to see them as individual and how they cooperate with living with other strangers, cope with the end of the world and so on.  I really thing the characters and characterization was a key to this movie.

It was a fresh air to see one of the guys killing himself because he missed his daughter, the couple breaking up but in a odd way and after some months the girl fuck up the other guy and the other girl a lesbian. After the first half hour I was hooked because I really wanted to know what happened and the ending leave some interesting unaswered questions. 

Afterwards they discover that they had been watched for all time by some organization and there were several dozen rooms just equal to the one they were in. In the end with only the lesbian and the guy that initially work for them they went back to their own "shelter" and stay there and continue to live as nothing had happened. 

This movie is a low budget movie and the actors are not that good but the characterization is quite extraordinay almost eclipsing their bad acting. The story being told in several time-lines worked like a charm and it make me grip the mobile I was watching to know what a heck was happening. The end left several unanswered questions but in a good way. It remind me of some other movie I watch 'Cube'.

Should you watch? Yes. It's a OK movie if you don't give up after 10m. Watch 20m if you are not grip by then then probably you are not going to like where they are going with it. 5.5/10