Review: Zombie Britannica by Thomas Emson




Title - Zombie Britannica
Author - Thomas Emson
Year - 2010
Stand Alone or Series - Anthology of interlinked stories
Pages - 440 (B Format Paperback)
Reading Time - March & April 2011
Rating: 5.5/10

Review and General Opinion
As you know I love zombie books so When I find a new one I want to read it. This one has been sitting on my desk for almost a year. Unfortunaly the book wasn't that great. Why? Well there are several flaws that I will come back later.

Spoilers inside
In this tale we follow three main characters. Vincent in Wales, Carrie in England and Craig in Scotland. Each one is related in some way (check the name list). Carrie battles through the street of london to save his daughter. Vicent is trapped in a castle in wales with the girl he loves and must coop with zombies outside and crazy people inside and finally Craig a problematic kid who are stuck in a traffic jam and when his baby sister is kidnap by a crazy human he must battle himself, humans and the undead. This sound good but the concretization of the novel was not that good. So what fail?

When the zombies enter the fray right from the first chapter they hit so hard that humans start dwinling rapidly. Each chapter (all 80 of them) change from one character to another. They each try to coup with the adversities thrown to them be that zombies or other humans. Vincent tries to save himself and his girlfriend and after several incidents featuring zombies and some crazy fanatics he leads them to the sea to a boat. But unfortunally his sweetheart is transformed into a zombie and the book ends in a clinfhanger as she is currently transforming into a zombie inside a ship. Carrie with the help of a noawadays knight that could have been taken out from a XIII world tries to help her rescue her child. They battle zombies, a group of kids who are playing "Sacrifice-a-person-to-a-zombie-and-laugh-out-loud", and even a bunch of religious fanatics who imprisions them. After many battles mainly won they arrive at the house where she kills her dead-husband and saves his young girl. Meanwhile she is saving her child she have sex with her knight (who does it when all hell is breaking loose?) They hide inside a house as the army battles the zombies. They fvck as the battle is going on... (Talk about disturbed minds). After leaving the city the knights reveals that he is changing to a zombie and mother and child are trapped inside a church with zombies outside. Another clifhanger. The third character is a problematic kid with no regard to humankind or property. To me that's not problematic because this character should be the more fun to read but the author doesn't do a good work. This boy and his family are trapped in a motorway and after the rescue by a truck driver they escape the zombies. when he and his sister climb to the truck to ride there (Which father and mother would let that) they are kidnapped. He beats him and take the girl. After some adversities the boy arrives where the truckdriver his and after releases some zombies and his sister. The zombies take care of the humans and they escape to find their mother with a group of survivors. Between these story we get a view into the mother and father of Craig. 
In the end we left with two cliffhangers and one half close story.

Criticism
- All of this happened in one day (remmember this)
- Within several minutes the zombies start sweeping across Britain. Interesting was that no warning was given and they seem to arrive everywhere, all at once 
- After a couple of hours there was talk of forced breeding, acts of brutality, religiou fervour and cannibalism. It's a propestorous the situation. I Know they are some crazed people but it's too much.
- One character is so desperate to cross London to get to her child, she gets into a car with people who are clearly violent cannibal rapists. And every scenario she makes the a lethal choice, only to be rescued by a criminal guy with a Knight Syndrome. 
- The stupidity of all characters. No redeemable characters.
- Psycological was very, very bad. The author clearly think so low of humans that he gave that way. People not believing what is happening, yes that can be. Religious fervour, yes. Cannibalistic person after two hours.. nope. Talks of cross-breeding after two hours.. no. Sex as battle rages on and as they are in a quest to find the daughter.. No. (I believe that people whould act very differently from what they are normally but there is a limit of course. Maybe after days of more time there could be some thoughts that I said before but not after one hour or two).
- Link to the above. Apart from the main characters (and Gavin the gay guy from wales) nobody seems to be thinking straight and only thinking about their escape? 
- Every kind of stereotypes from other zombie novels are presented here. This was like a russian salad (that's the name?)
- Huge plot holes. If the main characters know that a zombie bite turns into a zombie why leaving them with them? Why does Vincent leave Holly in the back with only a half-turn zombie behind her? WHAT? Who does that? The justification is "He doesn't want to other group members to find that he is favour her..." What a heck man?
- People in an impregnable castle open the doors... WHAT? WHY? Not once but several times... They deserved to die!

Good Things
- The zombie idea that the sun gives them strenght and the night makes them letarghic. But a not so good thing is the skeleton guys... they are not zombies after centuries and centuries.
- Nobody can say that the book wasn't fast paced. Because it was.
- The first line as it says that this was based on a scientific warning. Very nice. 
- Lord of the flies meet Mad Max meets Zombie movie
- The last chapter from the point of view of holly as she turns into a zombie.
- Some Lines like "Bert: This happen very often in england? - Vincent: We're not in England - Bert: PAh like it's important... (This happens a lot in portugal as they confuse with Spain).
- The mother of craig as all mayhem unfolds around her she tells to the husband " Stop swearing in front of the children". Who says that in that situation? - Another line "They must be kids on drungs" (As she tells the zombies attack the cars and people)

Cast
Scotland

Carrie Asher 
Boyd - Husband of Carrie & Brother of Vincent - Zombie - Killed by Carrie.
Mya - Daugter of Boyd and Carrie
Sawyer - Knight & Robber - Turn to Zombie
Daddy - Robber - Turn to Zombie
Sonny - Robber - Turn to Zombie
Kaylee - Gang Victim (dead by policeman)

Wales
Vincent (brother of Boyd)
Holly - girlfriend of Vincent - Turn to zombie by Roger
Oswyn - castle supervisor - Escaped Castle (Presumly dead)
Bert - Typical american - Turn to Zombie
Patty ( Typical Devout American Christian ) wife of bert - Turn to zombie
Gavin (gay) lost it's partner - Turn to zombie
Andrew - killed - Dead
Penny - Turn to zombie,
Roger - Turn to zombie in the sewers  - Dead
Simon -bodybuilder bit by Andrew - Dead

Scotland
Craig Murray - Troublemaker
Samantha - Sister of Craig
Art - Driver, Cannibal (?) kidnapped Samantha
Terry - Father of Craig - Drunk, sacrificied himself to kill zombies 
Mother - Mother of Carrie (long time ago), Craig and Samantha) - Typical Denial of Truth...

Conclusion
Would I recommend this book? Only to the die-hard fans of zombie fiction and even them dont' expect nothing new or original or good. Read to your own peril. You will want the zombies to eat the humans. That's what I wanted. 


Comments

Anonymous said…
Scoff not at the natural defects of people which are not in their power to amend. It is cruel to beat a cripple with his own crutches.